stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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