Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
