More tranny stories later!
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
