Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
