I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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