I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
