apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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