he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
