I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize