Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
