some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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