brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize