I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
