i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
