what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
