sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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