halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
