On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
