i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
