took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
