u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
