The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
