I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize