do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
