Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.