please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Randomize
