i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
