Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
