Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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