Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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