I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
