then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
