I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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