just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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