Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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