also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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