For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
