What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
