ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
You left your phone here
Wait...
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