I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
