If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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