waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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