but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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