absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
He better not be in your backpack
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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