I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
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I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
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He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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