So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
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