I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
