my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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