I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Randomize
