Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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