some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Let's get the cat blown out
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize