literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
